Grace

In my extensive parenting research, I found a series of tests that tell you if you are ready to have kids. Here are just a few of the highlights:

• The Dressing Test: Obtain one large, live, unhappy octopus. Place it into a small mesh bag making sure that all the arms stay inside.
• The Mess Test: Smear peanut butter on the sofa and curtains. Place a fish stick behind the couch and leave it there all summer.
• The Toy Test: Spread a 5 gallon bucket of Lego’s (or roofing tacks) all over the house. Put on a blindfold and try to walk to the kitchen. Don’t scream, because this would wake up a sleeping child.

To pass these tests, you don’t really have to do much… just endure some unpleasantness without getting too upset. Ashley and I are finding that the real tests of parenting require much more than that. Here are a couple tests we’ve encountered: