• The Dressing Test: Obtain one large, live, unhappy octopus. Place it into a small mesh bag making sure that all the arms stay inside.
• The Mess Test: Smear peanut butter on the sofa and curtains. Place a fish stick behind the couch and leave it there all summer.
• The Toy Test: Spread a 5 gallon bucket of Lego’s (or roofing tacks) all over the house. Put on a blindfold and try to walk to the kitchen. Don’t scream, because this would wake up a sleeping child.

To pass these tests, you don’t really have to do much… just endure some unpleasantness without getting too upset. Ashley and I are finding that the real tests of parenting require much more than that. Here are a couple tests we’ve encountered:

• The Trust Test: Understand you are not in control. Don’t despair, but delight in the fact that God is in control. Don’t trust in yourself. Trust God with everything, including your child’s salvation, life, health, and future. Teach your child to do the same.

As soon as our daughter Grace was born, this test was underway. Doctors immediately admitted Grace to the ICU because she was having trouble breathing. During those moments, it was clear that we were not in control. There was nothing we could do to change the circumstances, so we had to trust God. As we prayed for Grace, our family and home group prayed along with us. God used circumstances we would never have chosen to demonstrate how trustworthy He is. In the middle of uncertainty and temptations to fear, God gave us peace that I still don’t understand, and He sustained Grace and protected her.

• Here’s another test: The Strength Test. First, exhaust your own spiritual and physical strength (you’ll be surprised how easy this is). Continue your God-given responsibilities joyfully, relying on God’s strength. As a bonus, call to mind 2 Corinthians 12:9, which says “Therefore, I will boast all the more gladly of my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ may rest upon me.”

Grace improved over the next few days in the hospital, and the situation became less frightening, but more exhausting. We came to the end of our own strength very quickly. Again, God used family and church family to help us, encourage us, and strengthen us. When we were mentally and physically drained, God gave us strength for each moment. Within a week, we were able to bring Grace home! Taking a healthy baby home was such a blessing, and I don’t think we would have appreciated it as much if there had been no difficulties at all.

There are so many ways Grace has been a blessing to us. Knowing the love we have for her has helped us better understand the perfect love our heavenly Father has for us. Seeing how much Grace needs us is a very constant reminder of how much we need God. There are so many ways Grace delights us, but even in the less than delightful moments, we’re reminded that God is our strength, and that too is a blessing.

So now that we’ve been given charge of these little blessings, how are we to raise them?

Proverbs 22:6 says, “Train up a child in the way he should go; even when he is old he will not depart from it.” This implies the way a child should go is not the way they would go, left to themselves. Right now, Grace is a really cute little worker of iniquity. Her inclination to sin is well-hidden behind her chubby little cheeks and toothless grin, but the Bible teaches us that it’s there. Very soon, it will begin to manifest itself. When it does, it will be our job to gently and lovingly correct her.

As we correct her, we have to remember Ephesians 6:4, which says, “Fathers, do not provoke your children to anger, but bring them up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord.” We can’t just tell our children what is right and wrong, but we also have to demonstrate a life of obedience to God. When their hearts resist being led, we must be consistent in disciplining and training them to understand why God is right and their hearts are not. When they need correcting over and over again, we must be patient with them. J.C. Ryle said, “[children's] minds are like a lump of metal-not to be forged and made useful all at once, but only after a succession of little blows of the forger’s hammer.” For those who are wondering, this is not a subtle endorsement of the use of hammers in parenting. It is a reminder that consistent and patient corrections, even if they are small, can bear much fruit in the long-term.

As parents, we plant the seeds of the Gospel in our children. We tell them about God, about sin, about the consequences of sin, about Jesus’ perfect sacrifice, and how they can be saved by trusting in Him. We make sure they know this from their earliest days.

As the church, you help us in this. You encourage us to be godly in our parenting. You help us teach our children about God. You give us practical advice when we ask for it, and sometimes when we don’t ask, but need it anyway. You exhort us if we are not instructing our children. You correct us if we instruct our children one way and live a different way. You serve us and our children when you do these things.

But in all we do, we know unless God changes our children’s hearts, all the examples, explanations, discipline and education in the world won’t save them. We can plant the seeds of the Gospel, but God makes them grow. What we desire most is for God to draw these children to Himself, to give our children faith in Him, a love for Him, and a desire to follow Him.

And so we pray for our children’s salvation. We ask that you pray as well, and that you pray for us as we trust God and rely on His strength to train our children in the way they should go.